Internal Family Systems Therapy
(IFS)
What Is IFS?
Internal Family Systems, developed by Dr. Richard Schwartz, is based on a simple but radical idea: you are not one single, fixed self. You are a system of parts.
Think about the last time you were in conflict with yourself. Part of you wanted to speak up; another part stayed silent. Part of you wanted to rest; another part kept pushing. Part of you longs for closeness; another part keeps people at arm's length just in case.
These aren't contradictions. They're parts, each one carrying its own beliefs, feelings, and protective role. And most of them developed long before you had any say in the matter.
IFS helps you get to know these parts, not to eliminate them, but to understand what they've been carrying and why. Underneath even the most difficult parts of yourself, there is a Core Self: Calm. Curious. Compassionate. Clear. Courageous. Creative. Connected.
That Self has never left you. We're going to find our way back to it.
Who Is IFS For?
IFS is especially powerful for :
Developmental Trauma: If you grew up in a home where your emotions weren't welcomed, held, or understood, and learned to manage feelings by pushing them down, rationalizing them away, or distracting yourself before they could fully surface.
Stuck Relational Patterns: If you find yourself stuck in patterns you can see clearly but can't seem to change, the fawning, the over-giving, the self-abandonment, even when you understand exactly where they come from.
Negative Core Beliefs: If you have a harsh inner critic that is relentless. One that tells you you're too much, not enough, or that your needs don't matter. If you carry shame about who you are or how you show up, in relationships, in conflict, in the quiet moments when you're alone with your thoughts.
Lack of Self: If you feel disconnected from yourself, unsure of what you actually feel, want, or need, because you've spent so long attuned to everyone else.
If you are exhausted from managing, and ready to actually heal.
What to Expect
IFS is not a passive process. It is experiential, meaning we won't just talk about your patterns. We'll actually work with the parts underneath them in real time.
Here's what that might look like:
Getting curious, not critical. Instead of trying to stop a behavior, we'll get interested in it. What is that part of you trying to do? What is it afraid will happen if it lets go? This shift, from judgment to curiosity, is often where clients feel relief for the first time.
Meeting your protectors. Many of the parts that feel most disruptive, the one that shuts down, the one that overworks, the one that reaches for a drink or a scroll, are actually protectors. They developed to keep you safe. We'll learn to work with them, not against them.
Reaching the parts that carry the pain. Beneath the protectors are younger, more vulnerable parts, often carrying burdens they've held since childhood. Feelings of being unseen, unworthy, or too much. In IFS, we call these exiles. With care and at a pace that feels safe, we'll gently help these parts unburden what they've been carrying for far too long.
Coming home to your Self. As the system heals, something remarkable happens. You'll begin to respond to life from a place of groundedness rather than reactivity. You'll notice more spaciousness, more choice. The C words start to feel less like aspirations and more like who you actually are: calm, curious, compassionate, clear, confident, courageous, and connected.
This Work Is Not About Fixing You
It's about finally letting yourself be known, by me, and more importantly, by yourself.
You've been managing alone for a long time. You've been the capable one, the strong one, the one who holds it all together. IFS asks you to set that down for a little while and let the parts of you that have been working so hard finally get some rest.
You are not too much. You are not broken. You are a person who adapted brilliantly to a world that didn't always make room for you.
It's time to make room for yourself. Ready to get started? I'd love to meet you, all of you.
Book a Consultation
Book a free 15 minute phone consultation and take the first step. I’m here to listen, learn, and see if we’d be a good fit.